1. One who has affection for Almighty God must sacrifice himself for the sake of his Beloved-----such is the symbol of affection.
2. One who is sincere in his love for his Beloved will be obedient to his Loved One.
3. Love and affection for God, is to expel and erase from the heart everything unwanted and unloved by God--------the Lord of Majesty and Perfection.
4. Love and affection for God, is to burn to ashes all bad qualities, attributes and desires for the sake of the command and will of the True Beloved.
5. Love and affection for God, is to cleanse the self in the ocean of spiritual knowledge, and to enlighten it with the radiance of affection.
6. The lover will sacrifice for the Beloved reason, logic, and interest, will obey the Beloved in perfect bondage.
7. The lover will be ready to sacrifice everything he has for the Beloved. One who cannot lay down his life for the Beloved has no business pretending to the title of lover.
8. If you really are a lover of Truth, you must always and everywhere prefer God's words to the words of men.
9. If you love God be with Him and find Him in yourself. Be ever in search of His pleasure and desirous of His beauty.
10. The shortest route by which to draw near to God is dhikr (remembrance), by dhikr alone would it be possible to attain Divine Approval. [Above quotes by Shaykh Muzaffar Ozak]
Keeping alive the Islamic tradition of scholarship, insight, and purification...one day at a time.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
LESSON OF THE DAY 1152
Ayahs of the Day:
Believers, be conscious of God; and let every soul see what it has sent forth for the morrow. And be conscious of God, for God is aware of whatever you do. And don't be like those who have forgotten God, who therefore has made them forget their souls; they are the ones who are dissolute. [59: 18,19]
Hadith of the Day:
Whoever wishes to be delivered from the Fire (of hell) and enter the Garden (of paradise) should treat people as he wishes to be treated by them. [Muslim]
Wise Quote of the Day:
A man's character is that of the company he keeps. Thus, if a man achieves any state, inevitably his companions will be affected by it. [Imam al-Mawlud]
Guidance of the Day:
Learning to forgive and forget is essential. Remembering pain keeps it alive, perpetuates it. Forgive and forget everything from the past, so that you are free to be fully alive to today. Complete everything. Forget the source of the pain, for it really doesn't matter anymore. It is never too late to forgive or to say goodbye to experiences or events or people from the past.
Say whatever you need to say and do whatever you need to do, but be sure you have no unfinished business with the past. In doing so, you will give yourself the enormous freedom to live fully present to today, and the possibility of living a great life. The willingness to be open and awake to life, to engage wholeheartedly in life, and to live with passion means that you will reach enormous depths and expanses of human experiences. And sometimes life will hurt. But know that you have what it takes to recover yourself quickly. You don't have to suffer. NOW ENJOY YOURSELF! [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
Live everyday as if it were your last.
Do every job as if you were the boss.
Drive as if all other vehicles were police cars.
Treat everybody else as if he were you.
Believers, be conscious of God; and let every soul see what it has sent forth for the morrow. And be conscious of God, for God is aware of whatever you do. And don't be like those who have forgotten God, who therefore has made them forget their souls; they are the ones who are dissolute. [59: 18,19]
Hadith of the Day:
Whoever wishes to be delivered from the Fire (of hell) and enter the Garden (of paradise) should treat people as he wishes to be treated by them. [Muslim]
Wise Quote of the Day:
A man's character is that of the company he keeps. Thus, if a man achieves any state, inevitably his companions will be affected by it. [Imam al-Mawlud]
Guidance of the Day:
Learning to forgive and forget is essential. Remembering pain keeps it alive, perpetuates it. Forgive and forget everything from the past, so that you are free to be fully alive to today. Complete everything. Forget the source of the pain, for it really doesn't matter anymore. It is never too late to forgive or to say goodbye to experiences or events or people from the past.
Say whatever you need to say and do whatever you need to do, but be sure you have no unfinished business with the past. In doing so, you will give yourself the enormous freedom to live fully present to today, and the possibility of living a great life. The willingness to be open and awake to life, to engage wholeheartedly in life, and to live with passion means that you will reach enormous depths and expanses of human experiences. And sometimes life will hurt. But know that you have what it takes to recover yourself quickly. You don't have to suffer. NOW ENJOY YOURSELF! [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
Live everyday as if it were your last.
Do every job as if you were the boss.
Drive as if all other vehicles were police cars.
Treat everybody else as if he were you.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Pearls of Wisdom....191
1. Silence is golden--------the unsaid is often more important and deeper than the said.
2. Human beings, despite all of the new technologies of the modern era, are essentially weak and helpless.
3. Terrorism is a symptom of an illness, rather than the illness itself.
4. The traditional religious viewpoint states that our major preoccupation in life should be our relationship with the Creator.
5. We are spirit, not matter. The spirit is equipped with a body in order to be able to operate in the material universe.
6. At death, the spirit dissociates from the body in order to operate in another world.
7. The essence of spirituality and religion is the cultivation of our relationship with the Absolute.
8. Exercising our will and insisting on our plans lead to stress and anxiety.
9. Most problems, when solved, are not solved by voluntary decisions, but rather as the result of a process. [Above quotes by Joel Ibrahim Kreps]
2. Human beings, despite all of the new technologies of the modern era, are essentially weak and helpless.
3. Terrorism is a symptom of an illness, rather than the illness itself.
4. The traditional religious viewpoint states that our major preoccupation in life should be our relationship with the Creator.
5. We are spirit, not matter. The spirit is equipped with a body in order to be able to operate in the material universe.
6. At death, the spirit dissociates from the body in order to operate in another world.
7. The essence of spirituality and religion is the cultivation of our relationship with the Absolute.
8. Exercising our will and insisting on our plans lead to stress and anxiety.
9. Most problems, when solved, are not solved by voluntary decisions, but rather as the result of a process. [Above quotes by Joel Ibrahim Kreps]
Friday, September 25, 2009
LESSON OF THE DAY 1151
Ayahs of the Day:
God has decreed, "I will prevail I and My messengers." You won't find people who believe in God and the last day loving anyone who opposes God's messenger, even be it their fathers or their sons, or their brothers or their kin: God has written faith in their hearts, and supported them with spirit from divine. And God will admit them to gardens where streams flow below, to abide therein. God will be pleased with them, and they will be pleased with God. They are the partisans of God. Aren't the partisans of God the ones who succeed? [58: 21,22]
Hadith of the Day:
The scholars are the heirs of the Prophets, and the Prophets leave (no monetary inheritance) only knowledge, and he who takes it, takes an abundant portion. [Abu Dawud]
Wise Quote of the Day:
When God desires good for a slave, He draws close to him by means of (the slave's) remembrance of Him and makes him worthy of Him by means of his thankfulness. [Shaykh Abu Madyan]
Guidance of the Day:
Be committed and willing to overcome whatever you are experiencing, whether you are facing an illness, a loss, a disturbing event, or whatever. That will give you a sense of power over your circumstances and will help you surmount whatever you have to confront. Remember that there is enormous power in taking the stand "I will" or "I can." Even if you don't believe these words right now, by starting to use them you can turn your life around.
Next you must be willing to let go of your pain and go on. Now that you know, it is your choice to let go of pain or not. You are not a victim, for you can choose how and how much you suffer. It is essential, then, that you examine any beliefs or ideas or history that keeps you from being willing to heal today. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
We must not.....ignore the small daily differences we can make which, overtime, add up to big differences that we often cannot foresee. The man who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones. A terrace nine stories high begins with a pile of earth. The distance doesn't matter only the first step is difficult.
God has decreed, "I will prevail I and My messengers." You won't find people who believe in God and the last day loving anyone who opposes God's messenger, even be it their fathers or their sons, or their brothers or their kin: God has written faith in their hearts, and supported them with spirit from divine. And God will admit them to gardens where streams flow below, to abide therein. God will be pleased with them, and they will be pleased with God. They are the partisans of God. Aren't the partisans of God the ones who succeed? [58: 21,22]
Hadith of the Day:
The scholars are the heirs of the Prophets, and the Prophets leave (no monetary inheritance) only knowledge, and he who takes it, takes an abundant portion. [Abu Dawud]
Wise Quote of the Day:
When God desires good for a slave, He draws close to him by means of (the slave's) remembrance of Him and makes him worthy of Him by means of his thankfulness. [Shaykh Abu Madyan]
Guidance of the Day:
Be committed and willing to overcome whatever you are experiencing, whether you are facing an illness, a loss, a disturbing event, or whatever. That will give you a sense of power over your circumstances and will help you surmount whatever you have to confront. Remember that there is enormous power in taking the stand "I will" or "I can." Even if you don't believe these words right now, by starting to use them you can turn your life around.
Next you must be willing to let go of your pain and go on. Now that you know, it is your choice to let go of pain or not. You are not a victim, for you can choose how and how much you suffer. It is essential, then, that you examine any beliefs or ideas or history that keeps you from being willing to heal today. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
We must not.....ignore the small daily differences we can make which, overtime, add up to big differences that we often cannot foresee. The man who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones. A terrace nine stories high begins with a pile of earth. The distance doesn't matter only the first step is difficult.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Pearls of Wisdom....190
1. You will not open the Furqan before you open the Qur'an.
2. Miss Fajr will help you feel tired all day.
3. Those who sleep with Miss Fajr may catch a disease.
4. If you do not sanctify the dawn the day will not sanctify you.
5. Through selflessness we join the world.
5. Islam does not give you a full account of God, but it gives you the fullest account of God.
7. Govern the thoughts in your head, or else you will walk around dead.
8. You will only find yourself if only you live for others.
9. It is better to be tolerant than to be terminated.
10. Trying to be loved is not the best way of becoming lovable.
11. We need less self-righteousness and more self-knowledge. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
2. Miss Fajr will help you feel tired all day.
3. Those who sleep with Miss Fajr may catch a disease.
4. If you do not sanctify the dawn the day will not sanctify you.
5. Through selflessness we join the world.
5. Islam does not give you a full account of God, but it gives you the fullest account of God.
7. Govern the thoughts in your head, or else you will walk around dead.
8. You will only find yourself if only you live for others.
9. It is better to be tolerant than to be terminated.
10. Trying to be loved is not the best way of becoming lovable.
11. We need less self-righteousness and more self-knowledge. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
LESSON OF THE DAY 1150
Ayahs of the Day:
Secret conferences are from Satan, to grieve those who believe; but he cannot harm them at all, except by leave of God. So let the believers trust in God. [58: 10]
Hadith of the Day:
If a person has a standing in God's sight and he cannot reach that station through good works and piety, God afflicts him with such tribulations as illness until he does attain it. [Hakim]
Wise Quote of the Day:
Sincerity is realized through slaughtering one's ego by deeming even one's greatest works as unworthy. [Shaykh al-Jonayd]
Guidance of the Day:
The most important element in overcoming the pains and crises of life is the willingness to take on the challenge that life is, instead of being a victim of your experiences. Next, you need to be conscious enough that you do not keep putting salt into your own wounds by dramatizing or personalizing, by living in the past, by being right about suffering, by withholding yourself, and so on.
Finally, you need to be complete with your experiences and to forgive and forget as soon as possible to free yourself to go on with your life. There is no way you can end up feeling like a victim of your experiences in life if you manage them with this kind of awareness of what it takes to recover and heal. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
You are never so strong as when you forgive. Life is an adventure in forgiveness, it is the sweetest revenge. The weak can never forgive, forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. He who cannot forgive others, breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself, for every man has need to be forgiven.
Secret conferences are from Satan, to grieve those who believe; but he cannot harm them at all, except by leave of God. So let the believers trust in God. [58: 10]
Hadith of the Day:
If a person has a standing in God's sight and he cannot reach that station through good works and piety, God afflicts him with such tribulations as illness until he does attain it. [Hakim]
Wise Quote of the Day:
Sincerity is realized through slaughtering one's ego by deeming even one's greatest works as unworthy. [Shaykh al-Jonayd]
Guidance of the Day:
The most important element in overcoming the pains and crises of life is the willingness to take on the challenge that life is, instead of being a victim of your experiences. Next, you need to be conscious enough that you do not keep putting salt into your own wounds by dramatizing or personalizing, by living in the past, by being right about suffering, by withholding yourself, and so on.
Finally, you need to be complete with your experiences and to forgive and forget as soon as possible to free yourself to go on with your life. There is no way you can end up feeling like a victim of your experiences in life if you manage them with this kind of awareness of what it takes to recover and heal. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
You are never so strong as when you forgive. Life is an adventure in forgiveness, it is the sweetest revenge. The weak can never forgive, forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. He who cannot forgive others, breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself, for every man has need to be forgiven.
Friday, September 18, 2009
The Spirit of Jihad -----by Syed Junaid Hasan
Ours is an age of intellectual shallowness where we suffice ourselves with what we hear from the news media and its parade of so called "experts". We lap up whatever is thrown to us in the way of crudely edited sound bites and sensationalist headlines under the delusion that being "informed" somehow makes us more enlightened than even the wisest men of old. Given this atmosphere, it goes without saying that our perception of reality has been seriously tampered with. Our perception of the Islamic concept of Jihad is no exception.
In order to get past this middle of hack journalism and stereo typical imagery, we will ask how Jihad, as a religious and spiritual reality, has been viewed by the vast majority of Muslim adherents through out the vast majority of their history.
The Islamic world view sees man as the appointed representative of God on earth. And just as there is perfect harmony in the heavens, so has man been charged with maintaining harmony and equilibrium here on earth to reflect that of the heavens. This is by no means an easy task, and requires much striving and effort in obeying the word of God, directed both internally and externally, to ensure that justice and mercy endure during man's short time in this physical realm. It is exactly this effort and striving, which are the essences of the word Jihad. Just as there are countless aspects of human existence, so are there innumerable facets of human Jihad.
Jihad is the struggle to remove all those things from one's life that incur Allah's displeasure, and to replace them with those things that will gain His acceptance. Jihad is the struggle against one's inner self and it's bestial inclinations. It is this struggle, in fact, which the Prophet of Islam (peace be upon him) dubbed "the greater jihad." Having lived in the world for at least a few years, it is not hard for us to see why this is so. All the havoc that humans cause on this planet can be said to spring from those villains in our hearts, against whom the Prophet (peace be upon him) declared this great Jihad. These villains include: arrogance, avarice, pettiness, selfishness, jealousy, greed, self-delusions, and vain passions. Further more, Jihad is the struggle to replace these villains with goodly traits, such as mercy, honor, humbleness, generosity, gentleness, dignity, and other qualities that are aptly described as "heavenly."
Jihad is the struggle to fulfill the rights and responsibilities of one's family as well as those who are close, such as neighbors and relatives. To make sure that one does not harm either with his hand or his tongue. In the same token, Jihad is the struggle to forgive the wrongs of others, to over look their misgivings, and hide their faults.
Jihad is the struggle to help the needy, the orphan, the widow, and the homeless by sacrificing our wealth. It is to show love and gentleness to our young ones, and respect and dignity to our elders. It is to protect the honor and property of every single member of society, whether man or woman. Jihad is the struggle to speak out against injustice, to help the victims of oppression, to ensure that everyone is given just measure, regardless of gender, ethnicity or religion.
Ultimately, Jihad is that struggle in which we are willing to give our lives in the name of Allah so that these ideals will ensure and bring peace and justice to countless others, thus truly bringing the harmony of the heavens down the earth.
Though we can only skim the surface of this vast ocean, the essence of Jihad is tied to our very existence. For if we were to ask what the purpose of our creation is, then it is no less than a struggle, a Jihad, to submit our will to our Creator, thereby achieving peace and unity with the rest of the cosmos in celebrating His Majesty and Glory.
In order to get past this middle of hack journalism and stereo typical imagery, we will ask how Jihad, as a religious and spiritual reality, has been viewed by the vast majority of Muslim adherents through out the vast majority of their history.
The Islamic world view sees man as the appointed representative of God on earth. And just as there is perfect harmony in the heavens, so has man been charged with maintaining harmony and equilibrium here on earth to reflect that of the heavens. This is by no means an easy task, and requires much striving and effort in obeying the word of God, directed both internally and externally, to ensure that justice and mercy endure during man's short time in this physical realm. It is exactly this effort and striving, which are the essences of the word Jihad. Just as there are countless aspects of human existence, so are there innumerable facets of human Jihad.
Jihad is the struggle to remove all those things from one's life that incur Allah's displeasure, and to replace them with those things that will gain His acceptance. Jihad is the struggle against one's inner self and it's bestial inclinations. It is this struggle, in fact, which the Prophet of Islam (peace be upon him) dubbed "the greater jihad." Having lived in the world for at least a few years, it is not hard for us to see why this is so. All the havoc that humans cause on this planet can be said to spring from those villains in our hearts, against whom the Prophet (peace be upon him) declared this great Jihad. These villains include: arrogance, avarice, pettiness, selfishness, jealousy, greed, self-delusions, and vain passions. Further more, Jihad is the struggle to replace these villains with goodly traits, such as mercy, honor, humbleness, generosity, gentleness, dignity, and other qualities that are aptly described as "heavenly."
Jihad is the struggle to fulfill the rights and responsibilities of one's family as well as those who are close, such as neighbors and relatives. To make sure that one does not harm either with his hand or his tongue. In the same token, Jihad is the struggle to forgive the wrongs of others, to over look their misgivings, and hide their faults.
Jihad is the struggle to help the needy, the orphan, the widow, and the homeless by sacrificing our wealth. It is to show love and gentleness to our young ones, and respect and dignity to our elders. It is to protect the honor and property of every single member of society, whether man or woman. Jihad is the struggle to speak out against injustice, to help the victims of oppression, to ensure that everyone is given just measure, regardless of gender, ethnicity or religion.
Ultimately, Jihad is that struggle in which we are willing to give our lives in the name of Allah so that these ideals will ensure and bring peace and justice to countless others, thus truly bringing the harmony of the heavens down the earth.
Though we can only skim the surface of this vast ocean, the essence of Jihad is tied to our very existence. For if we were to ask what the purpose of our creation is, then it is no less than a struggle, a Jihad, to submit our will to our Creator, thereby achieving peace and unity with the rest of the cosmos in celebrating His Majesty and Glory.
Pearls of Wisdom....189
1. Real Islam is successful. If it is not successful, it is not real Islam.
2. Your wealth is only yours once you have given it away.
3. Yielding to a minor sin can be a major sin.
4. Those who are angry with everyone will end up believing in nothing.
5. Ritual is nothing but thankfulness, or it is nothing.
6. We have two many things and too little gratitude.
7. Do not be proud if she fears you, for she may also fear a rat.
8. A good leader gives and does not take.
9. It is gratitude that sees beauty.
10. Dignity comes from respecting tradition, not from respecting oneself. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
2. Your wealth is only yours once you have given it away.
3. Yielding to a minor sin can be a major sin.
4. Those who are angry with everyone will end up believing in nothing.
5. Ritual is nothing but thankfulness, or it is nothing.
6. We have two many things and too little gratitude.
7. Do not be proud if she fears you, for she may also fear a rat.
8. A good leader gives and does not take.
9. It is gratitude that sees beauty.
10. Dignity comes from respecting tradition, not from respecting oneself. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
LESSON OF THE DAY 1149
Ayahs of the Day:
Haven't you seen that God knows what is in the heavens and what is on earth? There is no private conference of three but God is their fourth; and none of five but God is their sixth; nor are there fewer than that or more but God is with them wherever they are. Then on the day of resurrection God will tell them what they did; for God knows everything. [58: 7]
Hadith of the Day:
A person is likely to follow the faith of his friends, so be careful about who you make your friend. [Ahmad]
Wise Quote of the Day:
If you devote yourself to God in this world, He will admit you among His chosen servants in the Hereafter. Such devotion, however, demands sacrifice and self-denial. [Al-Hujwiri]
Guidance of the Day:
Appreciating all of life, we can see painful events as opportunities, for those are the moments that truly stretch us and expand us to grow and deepen beyond who we think ourselves to be. In what may seem the worst of times, when we face loss and death and tragedy, we discover our heroism, our courage, our love, our creativity, and our power. These seemingly catastrophic experiences are occasions to stretch ourselves beyond whoever we have been up to now, to play life full-out. They are profound challenges.
Real life hurts and disappoints. However, out of our willingness to live a real life, instead of trying to force life to fit our unrealistic pictures, we can expand and grow beyond our wildest dreams. The opportunity in life is to accept ALL of it. Yes, life hurts, but the pain does not last, especially if we are truly committed to letting go of our suffering. Now is the best time of all to let it go. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenges and controversy. Experience is not what happens to a man, it is what a man does with that what happens to him. There is no education like adversity.
Haven't you seen that God knows what is in the heavens and what is on earth? There is no private conference of three but God is their fourth; and none of five but God is their sixth; nor are there fewer than that or more but God is with them wherever they are. Then on the day of resurrection God will tell them what they did; for God knows everything. [58: 7]
Hadith of the Day:
A person is likely to follow the faith of his friends, so be careful about who you make your friend. [Ahmad]
Wise Quote of the Day:
If you devote yourself to God in this world, He will admit you among His chosen servants in the Hereafter. Such devotion, however, demands sacrifice and self-denial. [Al-Hujwiri]
Guidance of the Day:
Appreciating all of life, we can see painful events as opportunities, for those are the moments that truly stretch us and expand us to grow and deepen beyond who we think ourselves to be. In what may seem the worst of times, when we face loss and death and tragedy, we discover our heroism, our courage, our love, our creativity, and our power. These seemingly catastrophic experiences are occasions to stretch ourselves beyond whoever we have been up to now, to play life full-out. They are profound challenges.
Real life hurts and disappoints. However, out of our willingness to live a real life, instead of trying to force life to fit our unrealistic pictures, we can expand and grow beyond our wildest dreams. The opportunity in life is to accept ALL of it. Yes, life hurts, but the pain does not last, especially if we are truly committed to letting go of our suffering. Now is the best time of all to let it go. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenges and controversy. Experience is not what happens to a man, it is what a man does with that what happens to him. There is no education like adversity.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Pearls of Wisdom....188
1. It is easy to preach on vengeance than on patience.
2. Pride is the crown of ignorant.
3. Only God can save us from thinking that we are gods.
4. Takbir is insincere when louder than Istighfar.
5. The world is the way it is because you are the way you are.
6. Hijab is not self-respect, it is Self-respect.
7. With God's secret gift, every hardship becomes easy. Without it, every ease becomes a source of hardship.
8. The world is most damaged by those who have the highest opinion of themselves.
9. Your nafs will never receive exactly what it wants.
10. Is the beast of divorce coming?
Husbands---------Respect her wants.
Wives--------------Respect his dignity. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
2. Pride is the crown of ignorant.
3. Only God can save us from thinking that we are gods.
4. Takbir is insincere when louder than Istighfar.
5. The world is the way it is because you are the way you are.
6. Hijab is not self-respect, it is Self-respect.
7. With God's secret gift, every hardship becomes easy. Without it, every ease becomes a source of hardship.
8. The world is most damaged by those who have the highest opinion of themselves.
9. Your nafs will never receive exactly what it wants.
10. Is the beast of divorce coming?
Husbands---------Respect her wants.
Wives--------------Respect his dignity. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
Saturday, September 12, 2009
A Successful Marriage....
A Sucessful Marriage: The Missing Link – by Yasmin Mogahed
“And among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between you; verily, in that are signs for people who reflect.” (Quran 30:21)
We’ve all read this verse on countless marriage announcements. But how many have actualized it? How many of our marriages really embody that love and mercy described by Allah? What is going wrong when so many of our marriages are ending in divorce?
According to Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, author of Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs, the answer is simple.
In his book, Eggerichs explains that extensive research has found that a man’s primary need is for respect, while a woman’s primary need is for love. He describes what he calls the “crazy cycle”—the pattern of argumentation that results when the wife does not show respect and the husband does not show love. He explains how the two reinforce and cause one another. In other words, when a wife feels that her husband is acting unloving, she often reacts with disrespect, which in turn makes the husband act even more unloving.
Eggerichs argues that the solution to the “crazy cycle” is for the wife to show unconditional respect to her husband and for the husband to show unconditional love to his wife. This means that a wife should not say that first her husband must be loving before she will show him respect. By doing so, she will only bring about more unloving behavior. And a husband should not say that first his wife must be respectful before he will show her love. By doing so, he will only bring about more disrespectful behavior. The two must be unconditional.
When I reflected on this concept, I realized that looking at the Quran and prophetic wisdom, there are no two concepts more stressed with regards to the marital relationship.
To men, the Prophet said, “Take good care of women, for they were created from a bent rib, and the most curved part of it is its top; if you try to straighten it, you will break it, and if you leave it, it will remain arched, so take good care of women.” (Bukhari & Muslim)
He has further stressed: “The most perfect believer in the matter of faith is one who has excellent behavior; and the best among you are those who behave best towards their wives.” (Al-Tirmidhi)
Allah says: “Live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and Allah brings about through it a great deal of good.” [Qur'an: 4:19]
The prophet has also said, “A believing man should not hate a believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will be pleased with another.” (Muslim)
In these jewels of wisdom, men are urged to be kind and loving towards their wives. Moreover, they are urged to even overlook their wife’s faults when showing that kindness and love.
On the other hand, when addressing the wife, the focus is different. Why are women not told again and again to be kind and loving towards their husbands? Perhaps it is because unconditional love already comes naturally to women. Few men complain that their wives do not love them. But many complain that their wives do not respect them. And it is this sentiment which is most stressed in the Quran and sunnah, with regards to wives.
Respect can be manifest in a number of ways. One of the most important ways to show respect is the respect of one’s wishes. When someone says, “I respect your advice”, they mean “I will follow your advice”. Respecting a leader, means doing what they say. Respecting our parents means not going against their wishes. And respecting one’s husband means respecting his wishes. The Prophet has said: “When any woman prays her five, fasts her month, guards her body and obeys her husband, it is said to her: Enter paradise from whichever of its doors you wish.” [At-Tirmidhi]
Why are we as women told to respect and follow the wishes of our husbands? It is because men are given an extra degree of responsibility. Allah says: “Men are the protectors and maintainers [qawwamun] of women, because Allah has given the one more [strength] than the other, and because they support them from their means . . .” (Qur’an 4:34)
But won’t this unconditional respect towards one’s husband put us, as women, in a weak, submissive position? Won’t we set ourselves up to be taken advantage of and abused? Quite the contrary. The Quran, the prophetic example, and even contemporary research have proven the exact opposite. The more respect a woman shows her husband, the more love and kindness he will show her. And in fact, the more disrespect she shows, the more harsh and unloving he becomes.
Similarly, a man may question why he should show kindness and love towards even a disrespectful wife. To answer this question, one only needs to look at the example of Omar Ibn ul-Khattab. When a man came to Omar (who was Khalifah at the time) to complain of his wife, he heard Omar’s own wife yelling at him. While the man turned to leave, Omar called him back. The man told Omar that he had come to complain of the same problem that Omar himself had. To this Omar replied that his wife tolerated him, washed his clothes, cleaned his home, made him comfortable, and took care of his children. If she did all of this for him, how could he not tolerate her when she raised her voice?
This story provides a beautiful example for all of us—not only for the men. This story is a priceless illustration of tolerance and patience, which is essential for any successful marriage. Moreover, consider the reward in the hereafter for those who show patience: Allah says, “Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in full without reckoning (or measure).” (Qur’an 39:10)
This article originally appeared in InFocus
“And among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between you; verily, in that are signs for people who reflect.” (Quran 30:21)
We’ve all read this verse on countless marriage announcements. But how many have actualized it? How many of our marriages really embody that love and mercy described by Allah? What is going wrong when so many of our marriages are ending in divorce?
According to Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, author of Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs, the answer is simple.
In his book, Eggerichs explains that extensive research has found that a man’s primary need is for respect, while a woman’s primary need is for love. He describes what he calls the “crazy cycle”—the pattern of argumentation that results when the wife does not show respect and the husband does not show love. He explains how the two reinforce and cause one another. In other words, when a wife feels that her husband is acting unloving, she often reacts with disrespect, which in turn makes the husband act even more unloving.
Eggerichs argues that the solution to the “crazy cycle” is for the wife to show unconditional respect to her husband and for the husband to show unconditional love to his wife. This means that a wife should not say that first her husband must be loving before she will show him respect. By doing so, she will only bring about more unloving behavior. And a husband should not say that first his wife must be respectful before he will show her love. By doing so, he will only bring about more disrespectful behavior. The two must be unconditional.
When I reflected on this concept, I realized that looking at the Quran and prophetic wisdom, there are no two concepts more stressed with regards to the marital relationship.
To men, the Prophet said, “Take good care of women, for they were created from a bent rib, and the most curved part of it is its top; if you try to straighten it, you will break it, and if you leave it, it will remain arched, so take good care of women.” (Bukhari & Muslim)
He has further stressed: “The most perfect believer in the matter of faith is one who has excellent behavior; and the best among you are those who behave best towards their wives.” (Al-Tirmidhi)
Allah says: “Live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and Allah brings about through it a great deal of good.” [Qur'an: 4:19]
The prophet has also said, “A believing man should not hate a believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will be pleased with another.” (Muslim)
In these jewels of wisdom, men are urged to be kind and loving towards their wives. Moreover, they are urged to even overlook their wife’s faults when showing that kindness and love.
On the other hand, when addressing the wife, the focus is different. Why are women not told again and again to be kind and loving towards their husbands? Perhaps it is because unconditional love already comes naturally to women. Few men complain that their wives do not love them. But many complain that their wives do not respect them. And it is this sentiment which is most stressed in the Quran and sunnah, with regards to wives.
Respect can be manifest in a number of ways. One of the most important ways to show respect is the respect of one’s wishes. When someone says, “I respect your advice”, they mean “I will follow your advice”. Respecting a leader, means doing what they say. Respecting our parents means not going against their wishes. And respecting one’s husband means respecting his wishes. The Prophet has said: “When any woman prays her five, fasts her month, guards her body and obeys her husband, it is said to her: Enter paradise from whichever of its doors you wish.” [At-Tirmidhi]
Why are we as women told to respect and follow the wishes of our husbands? It is because men are given an extra degree of responsibility. Allah says: “Men are the protectors and maintainers [qawwamun] of women, because Allah has given the one more [strength] than the other, and because they support them from their means . . .” (Qur’an 4:34)
But won’t this unconditional respect towards one’s husband put us, as women, in a weak, submissive position? Won’t we set ourselves up to be taken advantage of and abused? Quite the contrary. The Quran, the prophetic example, and even contemporary research have proven the exact opposite. The more respect a woman shows her husband, the more love and kindness he will show her. And in fact, the more disrespect she shows, the more harsh and unloving he becomes.
Similarly, a man may question why he should show kindness and love towards even a disrespectful wife. To answer this question, one only needs to look at the example of Omar Ibn ul-Khattab. When a man came to Omar (who was Khalifah at the time) to complain of his wife, he heard Omar’s own wife yelling at him. While the man turned to leave, Omar called him back. The man told Omar that he had come to complain of the same problem that Omar himself had. To this Omar replied that his wife tolerated him, washed his clothes, cleaned his home, made him comfortable, and took care of his children. If she did all of this for him, how could he not tolerate her when she raised her voice?
This story provides a beautiful example for all of us—not only for the men. This story is a priceless illustration of tolerance and patience, which is essential for any successful marriage. Moreover, consider the reward in the hereafter for those who show patience: Allah says, “Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in full without reckoning (or measure).” (Qur’an 39:10)
This article originally appeared in InFocus
Friday, September 11, 2009
Pearls of Wisdom....187
1. Da'wa should start at the point of harmony, not at the point of dissonance.
2. Who is a Shaykh? The one recognizes that his life will soon be over.
3. A busy life makes the prayer harder, but the prayer makes a busy life easy.
4. Your reach towards Him is tiny, His reach towards you has no limits.
5. The alternative to pride is prayer.
6. The truly taken rukhsas make you grow a little; the falsely taken rukhsas make you shrink rapidly.
7. Yielding to a minor sin can be a major sin.
8. We have too many things and too little gratitude.
9. Dignity comes from respecting tradition, not from respecting oneself.
10. Fear of God is knowledge enough. To be pleased with one's knowledge is ignorance enough. [Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
2. Who is a Shaykh? The one recognizes that his life will soon be over.
3. A busy life makes the prayer harder, but the prayer makes a busy life easy.
4. Your reach towards Him is tiny, His reach towards you has no limits.
5. The alternative to pride is prayer.
6. The truly taken rukhsas make you grow a little; the falsely taken rukhsas make you shrink rapidly.
7. Yielding to a minor sin can be a major sin.
8. We have too many things and too little gratitude.
9. Dignity comes from respecting tradition, not from respecting oneself.
10. Fear of God is knowledge enough. To be pleased with one's knowledge is ignorance enough. [Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
Thursday, September 10, 2009
LESSON OF THE DAY 1148
Ayahs of the Day:
Believers, be conscious of God and believe in the messenger of God: God gives you a double portion of divine mercy, and provides you light to go by, and forgives you. For God is forgiving, merciful, so the people of scripture may know that they have no control over anything of God's bounty, and that the bounty is in the hand of God, who bestows on anyone at will; and God is possessor of the greatest bounty. [57: 28,29]
Hadith of the Day:
In every generation of my nation there will be those who outrun all others (in doing good). [Tirmidhi]
Wise Quote of the Day:
The sign of good deeds that are precursors of great harm is that when we undertake them, we feel a great sense of elation and pride in what we have done. [Imam Birgivi]
Guidance of the Day:
Each one of us has an opportunity to choose how we will view all the experiences in our lives. We can choose to see our lives and each and every event in our lives as a gift! Imagine what life could be if we were delighted by and appreciative of everything that happens to us, every human encounter, every mood change, and every kind of event that occurs. We would not then judge events or people as good or bad, as pleasant or unpleasant, as wanted or unwanted. We would appreciate all of it.
Imagine how powerful it could be to see the opportunity in a loss, the opportunity to feel deeply, to have known such love or the opportunity to learn to let go, to pick ourselves up and begin life newly, differently than before, or the opportunity to feel compassion for someone else who hurts, too. Imagine taking on life with new vigor or in a new way after an illness or an accident. Imagine choosing to stop suffering NOW! [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
Permanence, perseverance, and persistence inspite of all obstacles, discouragements, and impossibilities. It is this, that in all things distinguishes the strong soul from the weak. Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance. Old age is not a matter for sorrow. It is a matter of thanks if we have left our work done behind us.
Believers, be conscious of God and believe in the messenger of God: God gives you a double portion of divine mercy, and provides you light to go by, and forgives you. For God is forgiving, merciful, so the people of scripture may know that they have no control over anything of God's bounty, and that the bounty is in the hand of God, who bestows on anyone at will; and God is possessor of the greatest bounty. [57: 28,29]
Hadith of the Day:
In every generation of my nation there will be those who outrun all others (in doing good). [Tirmidhi]
Wise Quote of the Day:
The sign of good deeds that are precursors of great harm is that when we undertake them, we feel a great sense of elation and pride in what we have done. [Imam Birgivi]
Guidance of the Day:
Each one of us has an opportunity to choose how we will view all the experiences in our lives. We can choose to see our lives and each and every event in our lives as a gift! Imagine what life could be if we were delighted by and appreciative of everything that happens to us, every human encounter, every mood change, and every kind of event that occurs. We would not then judge events or people as good or bad, as pleasant or unpleasant, as wanted or unwanted. We would appreciate all of it.
Imagine how powerful it could be to see the opportunity in a loss, the opportunity to feel deeply, to have known such love or the opportunity to learn to let go, to pick ourselves up and begin life newly, differently than before, or the opportunity to feel compassion for someone else who hurts, too. Imagine taking on life with new vigor or in a new way after an illness or an accident. Imagine choosing to stop suffering NOW! [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
Permanence, perseverance, and persistence inspite of all obstacles, discouragements, and impossibilities. It is this, that in all things distinguishes the strong soul from the weak. Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance. Old age is not a matter for sorrow. It is a matter of thanks if we have left our work done behind us.
Wednesday, September 09, 2009
Pearls of Wisdom....186
1. The road to God is paved with laughter at the self. The road to Hell is paved with the laughter at others.
2. Do not think that anything has any other purpose other than to point to God.
3. Do not say: 'Do you agree with me?' but say: 'Do we agree?'
4. Wisdom consists mainly in the ability to recognize human weakness.
5. God's mercy is not limited; but He is not limited by His mercy.
6. Only those who know themselves to be unworthy are worthy.
7. He who knows himself, knows Islam.
8. Man is the proof of God; the man of God is the proof of religion.
9. Being at ease in the company of scholars is a proof of faith.
10. Love learning, since learning leads to action. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
2. Do not think that anything has any other purpose other than to point to God.
3. Do not say: 'Do you agree with me?' but say: 'Do we agree?'
4. Wisdom consists mainly in the ability to recognize human weakness.
5. God's mercy is not limited; but He is not limited by His mercy.
6. Only those who know themselves to be unworthy are worthy.
7. He who knows himself, knows Islam.
8. Man is the proof of God; the man of God is the proof of religion.
9. Being at ease in the company of scholars is a proof of faith.
10. Love learning, since learning leads to action. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
Tuesday, September 08, 2009
LESSON OF THE DAY 1147
Ayah of the Day:
We have sent Our messengers with clear proofs, and We sent the Book and the Balance with them, that humanity may stand by justice. And We sent iron, in which is violent force and advantages for humanity, that God may know who will help God and God's messengers, though unseen. God is truly powerful, almighty. [57: 25]
Hadith of the Day:
God, Almighty and Majestic is He, says: "Whoever is so busy with the remembrance of Me that he has no time to ask Me (for what he desires) I will give him the best of what I give to those who ask." [Bukhari]
Wise Quote of the Day:
The best of people are those who, after being generous to people, seek generosity only from Allah, and those who, after exemplifying the blessed sunna, seek a lawful means of livelihood. [Abu Hafs Haddad]
Guidance of the Day:
Satisfaction is not necessarily found in our circumstances. It is not what happens in our lives as much as how we perceive what happens and how we live through what happens. How we view our lives and the events that occur is what makes all the difference in the quality that life has for us.
The pessimistic tortures himself, and the optimistic is delighted by and appreciative of the gift he receives. This can be true with each and every moment or event in our lives-------will we appreciate it or be disappointed? [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
We are born subjects, and to obey God is perfect liberty. He that does this shall be free, safe, and happy. To obey God in somethings and not in other shows an unsound heart. Childlike obedience moves toward every command of God, as the needle points where the load stone is.
We have sent Our messengers with clear proofs, and We sent the Book and the Balance with them, that humanity may stand by justice. And We sent iron, in which is violent force and advantages for humanity, that God may know who will help God and God's messengers, though unseen. God is truly powerful, almighty. [57: 25]
Hadith of the Day:
God, Almighty and Majestic is He, says: "Whoever is so busy with the remembrance of Me that he has no time to ask Me (for what he desires) I will give him the best of what I give to those who ask." [Bukhari]
Wise Quote of the Day:
The best of people are those who, after being generous to people, seek generosity only from Allah, and those who, after exemplifying the blessed sunna, seek a lawful means of livelihood. [Abu Hafs Haddad]
Guidance of the Day:
Satisfaction is not necessarily found in our circumstances. It is not what happens in our lives as much as how we perceive what happens and how we live through what happens. How we view our lives and the events that occur is what makes all the difference in the quality that life has for us.
The pessimistic tortures himself, and the optimistic is delighted by and appreciative of the gift he receives. This can be true with each and every moment or event in our lives-------will we appreciate it or be disappointed? [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
We are born subjects, and to obey God is perfect liberty. He that does this shall be free, safe, and happy. To obey God in somethings and not in other shows an unsound heart. Childlike obedience moves toward every command of God, as the needle points where the load stone is.
Friday, September 04, 2009
Pearls of Wisdom....185
1. Do not doubt another's salvation until you are certain of your own.
2. Good adab is to jostle to be first in line for Heaven.
3. There is no worship without knowledge----------we have been created to know Him.
4. Islamic democracy----------Sovereignty belongs to God.
5. I am my weakness, You (O' my Lord) are my strength.
6. Which is it, of the blessing of your Lord that you deserve?
7. There is justice and there is just-us.
8. Peace without justice is not peace at all.
9. The hijab is a display of modesty. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
2. Good adab is to jostle to be first in line for Heaven.
3. There is no worship without knowledge----------we have been created to know Him.
4. Islamic democracy----------Sovereignty belongs to God.
5. I am my weakness, You (O' my Lord) are my strength.
6. Which is it, of the blessing of your Lord that you deserve?
7. There is justice and there is just-us.
8. Peace without justice is not peace at all.
9. The hijab is a display of modesty. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
Thursday, September 03, 2009
LESSON OF THE DAY 1146
Ayahs of the Day:
No calamity occurs on earth, or to yourselves, but is in a decree before We create it. That is easy for God, so that you might not sorrow over what eludes you nor exult over what comes to you; for God loves no one who is pompous and proud, the ones who are stingy and induce people to be greedy; but no matter who turns away, God is the independent one, the one worthy of all praise. [57: 22,23,24]
Hadith of the Day:
Beware of the believer's insight, for he sees by the light of God. [Bukhari]
Wise Quote of the Day:
Rein in your tongue from complaining about others, and you will be granted a life of happiness. [Abu Bakr radi Allah anhu]
Guidance of the Day:
In learning to manage the forces around us, we let go of the wonder of life. We become intent on developing survival skills instead of stopping to appreciate the flowers or to love one another. In our drive for control, we forget pleasure and joy and satisfaction.
Even though we will always wish we could control life, we do not have to be run by these survival tactics. We can choose our responses to life. We can choose to have life be an energizing and provocative challenge that we take on powerfully rather than a series of ordeals of which we are victims. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
Anger is only one letter short of danger. Without discipline, there is no life at all. Man who would be man, must rule the empire of himself. He who conquers others is strong; he who conquers himself is mighty. Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power.
No calamity occurs on earth, or to yourselves, but is in a decree before We create it. That is easy for God, so that you might not sorrow over what eludes you nor exult over what comes to you; for God loves no one who is pompous and proud, the ones who are stingy and induce people to be greedy; but no matter who turns away, God is the independent one, the one worthy of all praise. [57: 22,23,24]
Hadith of the Day:
Beware of the believer's insight, for he sees by the light of God. [Bukhari]
Wise Quote of the Day:
Rein in your tongue from complaining about others, and you will be granted a life of happiness. [Abu Bakr radi Allah anhu]
Guidance of the Day:
In learning to manage the forces around us, we let go of the wonder of life. We become intent on developing survival skills instead of stopping to appreciate the flowers or to love one another. In our drive for control, we forget pleasure and joy and satisfaction.
Even though we will always wish we could control life, we do not have to be run by these survival tactics. We can choose our responses to life. We can choose to have life be an energizing and provocative challenge that we take on powerfully rather than a series of ordeals of which we are victims. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
Anger is only one letter short of danger. Without discipline, there is no life at all. Man who would be man, must rule the empire of himself. He who conquers others is strong; he who conquers himself is mighty. Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power.
Wednesday, September 02, 2009
Pearls of Wisdom....184
1. Religion is only one door, whose name is repentance.
2. Be a good Muslim and you won't want to lie. Be a very good Muslim and you won't need to lie.
3. Govern the self before you govern the other. Govern the other in order to govern the self.
4. The reading of Scripture is sufficient; but we are not sufficient readers.
5. In practice, 'remembering God' can only mean 'remembering the covenant.'
6. Each gender was created that the other might give thanks.
7. The only safe bank is the Sadaqa Bank.
8. Irritation is from sin.
9. The true hearth is gratefulness.
10. Your property belongs to you if you belong to God. If you belong to Satan you belong to your property. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
2. Be a good Muslim and you won't want to lie. Be a very good Muslim and you won't need to lie.
3. Govern the self before you govern the other. Govern the other in order to govern the self.
4. The reading of Scripture is sufficient; but we are not sufficient readers.
5. In practice, 'remembering God' can only mean 'remembering the covenant.'
6. Each gender was created that the other might give thanks.
7. The only safe bank is the Sadaqa Bank.
8. Irritation is from sin.
9. The true hearth is gratefulness.
10. Your property belongs to you if you belong to God. If you belong to Satan you belong to your property. [Above quotes by Shaykh Abdul Hakeem Murad]
Tuesday, September 01, 2009
LESSON OF THE DAY 1145
Ayah of the Day:
Race to forgiveness from your Lord, and a garden spacious as heaven and earth, arranged for those who believe in God and the messengers of God. That is the bounty of God, which God bestows on whomever God will; and God is the possessor of the greatest bounty. [57: 21]
Hadith of the Day:
Faith is known experientially by those who are content with God as their Sovereign, with Islam as their religion, and Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) as their messenger. [Bukhari]
Wise Quote of the Day:
Avoid incurring debts; for a debt is a humiliation by day and a grief by night. [Hakeem Luqmam]
Guidance of the Day:
One of the special secrets of having a life that is satisfying and easy is this: appreciate life instead of resisting it. Appreciation is the ability to get outside of our reasons, story, concepts, and beliefs in order to see the beauty, the value, and the preciousness of life. Appreciation is gratitude for life. We fully appreciate life when we can see the wonder of it all.
As children we naturally appreciate and value everything we see. We can be awed by a set of keys, a baby goat, or assorted pots and pans. We delight in all of it. An experience intervenes, we discover hurt, disappointment, and failure. Then we lose our sense of wonder, so our capacity to see and appreciate narrows. Life intrudes until wonderment and openness are virtually replaced by cynicism and resignation. Once our wonderment disappears, we forget that there is anything for which to be thankful. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
Keep your distance from bad companions. Life is a gift; embrace it with the temper of nobility. Be on your guard. One is ones own teacher and disciplinarian. Through practice we learn to surrender ourselves. Nothing is impossible when we have faith and we believe in Something beyond ourselves.
Race to forgiveness from your Lord, and a garden spacious as heaven and earth, arranged for those who believe in God and the messengers of God. That is the bounty of God, which God bestows on whomever God will; and God is the possessor of the greatest bounty. [57: 21]
Hadith of the Day:
Faith is known experientially by those who are content with God as their Sovereign, with Islam as their religion, and Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) as their messenger. [Bukhari]
Wise Quote of the Day:
Avoid incurring debts; for a debt is a humiliation by day and a grief by night. [Hakeem Luqmam]
Guidance of the Day:
One of the special secrets of having a life that is satisfying and easy is this: appreciate life instead of resisting it. Appreciation is the ability to get outside of our reasons, story, concepts, and beliefs in order to see the beauty, the value, and the preciousness of life. Appreciation is gratitude for life. We fully appreciate life when we can see the wonder of it all.
As children we naturally appreciate and value everything we see. We can be awed by a set of keys, a baby goat, or assorted pots and pans. We delight in all of it. An experience intervenes, we discover hurt, disappointment, and failure. Then we lose our sense of wonder, so our capacity to see and appreciate narrows. Life intrudes until wonderment and openness are virtually replaced by cynicism and resignation. Once our wonderment disappears, we forget that there is anything for which to be thankful. [Tatelbaum, You Don't Have to Suffer]
Food for Thought:
Keep your distance from bad companions. Life is a gift; embrace it with the temper of nobility. Be on your guard. One is ones own teacher and disciplinarian. Through practice we learn to surrender ourselves. Nothing is impossible when we have faith and we believe in Something beyond ourselves.
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