LESSON OF THE DAY 306

Ayahs of the Day:
And there is nothing against those who, when they came to you for you to provide transport for them, you told them, "I find no way to transport you," they turned back with their eyes overflowing with tears, grieved that they could find nothing to contribute. [9: 92]

Hadith of the Day:
It is a sign of the nearness of the hour that knowledge shall disappear and ignorance predominate, that adultery and alcohol drinking shall abound. [Bukhari]

Wise Quote of the Day:
The result of fear (of Allah) is that one is able to leave the forbidden, and the result of hope (in Allah) is that one remains firm footed in one's obedience. [Shaqeeq al Balkhi]

Guidance of the Day:
JIHAD: Ours is an age of intellectual shallowness where we suffice with what we hear from the news media and its parade of so called "experts." We lap up whatever is thrown to us in the way of crudely edited sound bites and sensationalist headlines under the delusion that being "informed" somehow makes us more enlightened than even the wisest men of old. Given this atmosphere, it goes without saying that our perception of reality has been seriously tampered with. Our perception of the Islamic concept of JIHAD is no exception.

In order to get past this middle of hack journalism and stereotypical imagery, we will ask how jihad, as a religious and spiritual reality, has been viewed by the vast majority of Muslim adherents throughout the vast majority of their history.

The Islamic worldview sees man as the appointed representative of God on earth. And just as there is perfect harmony in the heavens, so has man been charged with maintaining harmony and equilibrium here on earth to reflect that of the heavens. This is by no means an easy task, and requires much striving and effort in obeying the word of God, directed both internally and externally, to ensure that justice and mercy endure during man's short time in this physical realm. It is exactly this effort and striving, which are the essence of the word jihad. Just as there are countless aspects of human existence, so are there innumerable facets of human jihad.

Food for Thought:
Behind every sin, there are various detriments and harms; spiritual, physical, social, financial, and many others. The next time we feel like committing a sin, we should try to explain to ourselves that these body parts of mine if used against the wishes of Allah will be my enemies tomorrow.

LESSON OF THE DAY 305

Ayah of the Day:
There is to be no pressure on the weak, or on the sick, or on those who have nothing to contribute, if they are faithful to God and the messenger of God. There is no cause against those who do good. And God is most forgiving, most merciful. [9: 91]

Hadith of the Day:
It is a sign of hour that a man will obey his wife while antagonizing his mother and draw his friend nearer while pushing his father away. There will be loud voices in the mosques.

Wise Quote of the Day:
Generosity is the protector of good reputations, while knowledge is the silencer of fools. The most noble wealth is to give up objects of desire. [Ali radi Allah anhu]

Guidance of the Day:
Return to God: Imagine that you are to die the next day and return to God to stand before Him to be asked to account for your knowledge, behavior and all affairs of states. What you see there as most important and useful to you is precisely what you must give priority and attachment to, whereas what you find useless, unimportant, or of no great necessity is what you must neither pursue nor occupy yourself with.

Meditate on this matter and reflect well, it is of tremendous benefit to those who are concerned about their appointed time, their return to God, their salvation and their success in the Hereafter.

As it is incumbent upon one to excel in everything one does for the sake of God, such as good works, devotions, so it is incumbent to excel in abstaining from evil, forbidden and doubtful. Excellence in such circumstances is to refrain from such things out of sincerity, reverence, modesty, fear and awe of God the Exalted, and not out of modesty, shame or fear of people. Excellence in abstention is also to avoid situations where one may lapse and to avoid the company of such people as are likely to drag one along with them, "all success is from Allah."

Du'a of the Week:
Allahumma inni as'aluka min fuja'atil khair wa a'oozubika min fuja'atish shar. (O Allah I ask You for good surprises and I seek refuge in You from bad surprises).

Food for Thought:
Never put off till tomorrow what can be done today. Diligence is the mother of good luck. When one wastes time, his heart becomes complacent and lazy.

LESSON OF THE DAY 304

Ayahs of the Day:
The messenger and those who believe with him struggle by their property and their persons. So the good things are for them, and they are the successful ones. God has prepared gardens below which rivers flow, where they will abide; that is the great attainment. [9: 88,89]

Hadith of the Day:
The dinar and the dirham have destroyed those who were before you and they will destroy you. [Ibn Hibban]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Never assume that anyone in this world can really understand your own circumstances other than from the perspective of his own circumstances. [Ahmad al Zarruq]

Guidance of the Day:
As for the family of the deceased, they should be attended to by comforting them and assisting them through their mourning. The expression of sorrow, pain and anger is encouraged and accepted, provided it does not turn into histrionics, which are strictly forbidden. They are allowed to weep and mourn to the full, but never to slap their faces or rend their clothes, although it obviously happens at times.

They are reminded that, 'God is more Compassionate to them than a mother is to her infant,' that this is another trial that they must suffer, and that if they would only allow Him, God will help them and put fortitude in their hearts, forgive their sins and raise their degrees for it. All those who come to offer their condolences are expected to participate in this assuaging process, each in his own manner. The neighbors and relatives are expected to take over the task of preparing food for the visitors, seeing to the household needs. The family will be encouraged to visit the tomb, give away charity on behalf of the deceased, pray for him, recite the Qur'an, and, if required, perform Hajj and Umra on his behalf.

Until recently people of both sexes were encouraged to remarry not very long after losing their spouse. This resulted in the effective recognition of their lives, materially and emotionally, and the adequate fulfillment of the children's needs. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
Let us keep our mouths shut and our pens dry, until we know the facts.The surest thing to keep people from jumping down your throat is to keep your mouth shut.

LESSON OF THE DAY 303

Ayah of the Day:
And do not let their wealth and their progeny appeal to you; God only wants to afflict them thereby in this world, and their souls may perish while they are in denial. [9: 86]

Hadith of the Day:
The (significance of) this world (in comparison) to the Hereafter is similar to one of you dipping his finger in the ocean and then seeing (the amount of water that) has stuck to it. [Muslim]

Wise Quote of the Day:
If you devote yourself to God in this world, He will admit you among His chosen servants in the Hereafter. Such devotion, however, demands sacrifice and self denial, the two instruments that make union with God possible. [Al Hujwiri]

Guidance of the Day:
One of the obvious mercies that God bestows upon his servants is that many of those Muslims who live in forgetfulness of their lives to come are made to suffer a long illness before their death. The result is that detachment from the world and meditation on the Hereafter is gradually forced on them so that when the time comes they are thoroughly prepared.

This is why the notion of euthanasia does not arise in a Muslim climate. The current attitude that life must be prolonged at any cost has crept in, however, especially among Muslim medical practitioners, and by the same token the Islamic concern in providing the Muslim with a dignified death has weakened. To insist on saving someone's life at all costs may mean in many instances keeping him in intensive care with tubes coming out of every single orifice, unable to speak or say the shahada, and distracted by the frantic activities of the staff.

It is much more important to allow a Muslim to die as he should than to try save his life at the cost of robbing him of the opportunity to do so. For dying should be attended by godly people who will remind him to say La ilaha illa Llah by simply repeating it in his ear, not by commanding him to say it. They should also recite surah Ya Sin and other portions of the Qur'an and continuously pray for him. The dying should be helped to remain in a state of ritual purity, and they should be reminded of the immensity of God's mercy, of the expected intercession by the Prophet, may God's blessings and peace be upon him, and of other hopeful things. In this way the dying person may die hoping for God's mercy and expecting His forgiveness. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
Persistence and obstinacy are evil, there is honor in admitting one's faults. Those who are full of themselves are likely to be empty.

LESSON OF THE DAY 302

Ayahs of the Day:
Those who slander and ridicule the believers who willingly give charitable donations and the ones who have nothing but their labor, God will ridicule them; and there is a painful punishment for them. [9: 79]

Hadith of the Day:
There will appear at the end of time men who will sell the Hereafter for this world, they will wear fleeces of sheep, so smooth they will be, their tongues will be sweeter than suger, but their hearts will be of wolves. [Al Hahim]

Wise Quote of the Day:
If you are not patient, then try to be like one who is patient, for seldom does anyone immitate people without verging on being one of them. [Ali radi Allah anhu]

Guidance of the Day:
The weaker the man's faith and the greater his ignorance of matters of death and the Hereafter, the greater will be his attachment to the world and reluctance to separate from it. This is why we are strongly encouraged to remember death frequently. 'Remember often the defeater of pleasures; death,' said the Prophet, may God's blessings and peace be upon him.

And when asked, 'Who among believers are the most segacious?' he replied, 'Those who remember death most aften and are the best in preparing for what follows it; those are sagacious. He encouraged regular visits to the cemetery for the same reason. The remembrance of death detatches one from the world, reducing everything in it to its proper proportions and renders death and the events that are to follow it familiar and much less frightening. This makes death itself that much easier.

Most Muslims nowadays, however, are ignorant of these things and are thus horrified by the mere mention of death. Their attitude is thus the exact opposite of what is taught to be; they come that much closer to the disbelievers' stance, who, because they know of no Paradise apart from this life, are exceedingly reluctant to leave it and can never understand that someone in his right mind should be eager to do so. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
Quarrels would never last long, if there were not faults on both sides.To understand is to forgive. What is done cannot be undone. Soft words are hard arguments.

LESSON OF THE DAY 301

Ayahs of the Day:
So God has put hypocrisy in their hearts until the day they meet God, because they broke their promise to God, and because they were lying. Do they not know that God knows their secret and their clandestine counsel, and that God is thoroughly aware of all hidden things? [9: 77, 78]

Hadith of the Day:
There will come a time upon people when a man will not care how he gains his money, lawfully or unlawfully. [Nasai]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Surrender yourselves before God in the manner of the devout saints; then God will hold you just as dearly as He did the devout who went before you. Therefore follow His commandments and bear every affliction with patience. Adhere consciously the path that will lead you to the ultimate freedom. [Sheikh Abdul Qadir Jilani]

Guidance of the Day:
Death is nothing more than the passage from one dimension of existence into another, that is, from earthly life to the Intermediary Realm. Those who know it to be so and prepare for it accordingly will watch it approaching calmly and serenely, the usual loathing and terror being replaced by the expectation of relief from suffering.

The man of knowledge welcomes death in the full awareness of what is to follow and knows that, as the hadith states, 'The world is the prison of the believer and the Garden of the disbeliever.' Those who long to meet their Lord in the perfection of the life-to-come experience the world's distractions and pleasures as so many obstacles standing between them and their goal.

They struggle against their egos and feel their brothers' sufferings as acute as they feel their own. They are constantly resisting the downward pull of the world and are offended and aggrieved by deviant behavior in others. They also know that, 'Those who love to meet God, God loves to meet them, and they know of the peace and delights of the Garden and the beatific vision of the Divine countenance. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
A pessimistic always looks both ways when he crosses a one way street. He who is over cautious will achieve little in life.

LESSON OF THE DAY 300

Ayahs of the Day:
And among them are those who promised God, "If You give us from the Divine bounty, we will certainly give charity and be among the righteous." But when God gave them some Divine bounty, they were stingy with it and turned away, being shirkers. [9: 75, 76]

Hadith of the Day:
There will come upon the people when they will take usury, those who do not take it will be affected by the dust of it. [Ibn Majah, Nasai]

Wise Quote of the Day:
All containers are reduced in capacity by what is placed in them, except a container of knowledge, which expands. [Ali radi Allah anhu]

Guidance of the Day:
Whatever has to be done should always be done with efficiency and precision. 'God has decreed that everything you do should be done with excellence,' says the hadith. A Muslim is thus obliged to keep his activities under constant scrutiny and never allow himself to fall short of the required standard or be guilty of neglect. The extent to which he fails to comply with this rule is the degree to which his faith and knowledge of the requirements of his religion are defective.

A Muslim strives for excellence in every act in the awareness that it is God who is watching him, not his foreman. The extent to which Muslim communities are failing to function efficiently is a result of the weakness that has befallen their faith and that has become ubiquitous.

It has become clear beyond dispute that modern technology, production lines and bureaucracy dehuminize people. Nothing can be done about this at the moment except to try to counteract these effects by deliberate and intensive religious and cultural input in the workers' free time. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
Team spirit: If anything goes bad, "I did it." If anything goes real good, then "We did it." It is better to be faithful than famous. It is better to keep a friend from falling than to help him up after he falls.

LESSON OF THE DAY 299

Ayahs of the Day:
God has promised the believing males and the believing females gardens underneath which rivers flow, to abide in them, and pleasant dwellings in gardens of eternity. But approval from God is greater; that is the most important success. [9: 72]

Hadith of the Day:
God does not remove knowledge by wresting it away from the people, but He removes knowledge by taking away scholars until, when no (true) scholar remains, the people will make leaders out of ignorant men who will answer without knowledge when asked (and) they will thereby stray and lead others astray. [Bukhari & Muslim]

Wise Quote of the Day:
The serene place belongs to the one occupied with the correction of his own self, who struggles against it in every state. [Shaykh Muhammad ibn al Habib]

Guidance of the Day:
Muslims are not obsessed with productivity, work should be kept within its proper limits and never be allowed to interfere with other duties such as acts of worship, the pursuit of religious knowledge, the nurturing of kinship bonds and other social obligations, as well as recreational activities within lawful limits. Those unable to earn are the direct responsibility of their nearest relatives, and it is extremely dishonorable to allow them to be cared for in an institution.

It is incumbent on every Muslim to make himself as useful as possible to his community, not only by his formal contribution to the economy or the benefits derived from his job as such, but in all the ways demonstrated by the Sunna, such as by learning and teaching others what he has learned, offering good counsel and emotional support to those who need them, and so on.These aspects of Muslim responsibilities are coming to be neglected with increasing urbanization and alienation; the only activity nowadays granted the honorable lable of 'useful' is work. [Man & The Universe]

Du'a of the Week:
Allahumma la tusallit alaina bi zunubina malla yakhafuka wala yarhamna (O Allah do not impose upon us because of our sins, the one who does not fear You nor show mercy towards us).

[The above dua seems to be a real need for the umma in our present situation].

Food for Thought:
He who speaks much is much mistaken. The reason talk is cheap is that supply far out paces the demand. Even a fish wouldn't get into trouble if it kept it's mouth shut.

LESSON OF THE DAY 298

Ayah of the Day:
The believing men and believing women are protectors of each other; they enjoin what is beneficial and forbid what is abominable, and practice prayer and give charity, and obey God and God's messenger. They are the one's on whom God will have mercy. For God is almighty, most wise. [9: 71]

Hadith of the Day:
Scholars are heirs to the Prophets: for Prophets bequeath neither dinar nor dirham, but they bequeath knowledge, and those who receive it will have received an ample share. [Bukhari]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Be extremely vigilant about avoiding positions of leadership, but should you be tried with such matters atleast know your own limitations. [Ahmad al Zarruq]

Guidance of the Day:
The norm in Islamic terms is nothing less than the original or primordial nature of man, or his fitra.The reason why this is termed 'norm' and not 'ideal' is that, far from being a mere theoretical or hypothetical construction, this pattern was actually lived in Madina in the early days of Islam and still is, to this very day, by those who strive to realize it in full. The norm in Islam is thus the sunna of the prophet, may God's blessings be upon him, and that of the Companions and Followers.

The sunna represents the very perfection of human behavior and anything less than that is considered abnormal. The Islamic norm, as lived by the Prophet Muhammad, may God's blessings and peace be upon him, covers a vast range of human behavior. For besides his function as Divine Messenger and legislator, which is exclusive and inimitable, he also lived the roles of orphan, shepherd, merchant, father, adoptive father, grandfather, warrior, political leader, and husband of women both older and younger than himself.

At times he was poor to the extent of not having cooked food in his house for weeks on end, while at other times he was rich to the extent of being able to give away a valley full of sheep. He survived mortal dangers, plots, and immense hardships, saw all his children but one die before him, began his emigration as a fugitive hiding in a cave, and eventually returned to Makkah as a conqueror. This, together with what is on record concerning the pattern of behavior of his companions and his approval or criticism of them, leaves almost nothing of what human beings think, feel, say or do without a clear model to emulate. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
O' God! Give us clear vision so we may know where we stand and what to stand for, because unless we stand for something, we shall fall for anything.

LESSON OF THE DAY 297

Ayah of the Day:
Haven't they heard the story of those who were before them--the people of Noah, and Ad, and Thamud, and the people of Abraham, and the Midianites, and the overthrown cities? Their messengers came to them with clear evidences, and God would not wrong them, but they used to wrong themselves. [9: 70]

Hadith of the Day:
Islam began as a stranger and will revert to being a stranger as it once was. Therefore, blessed are the strangers who remain virtuous when everyone else becomes corrupt. [Muslim, Tirmidhi]

Wise Quote of the Day:
The one who is esteemed by people should deem himself worthy of no such honor or respect, so as not to fall into delusion. [Abdullah ibn Mubarak]

Guidance of the Day:
Man cannot live without some kind of religion: even those who hold that there is no such thing as religion merely substitute one set of beliefs for another.

Religion consists of a doctrine which explains what man is, his position within the universe, and his relationship with the Absolute. It offers a law which regulates man's transactions with his environment, and beyond that, it offers a method of spiritual ascent. It should always be remembered that the memory of the lost paradise lingers on within men as does the feeling of the upward pull of the spirit.

When Christianity lost its credibility and hence its power to explain, it was simply replaced by the more materialistic alternatives on offer. Thus instead of seeking to reach the real paradise, people busied themselves with obtaining as much pleasure from the only paradise left to them--that of immediate enjoyment in this life. And instead of striving along the path of spiritual ascent, they chose the cruder and more materialistic alternative to satisfy this need, which was to reach for the moon. The explanations of religion were replaced by scientific theories, with more conjecture being presented as fact and held onto as tenaciously as any religious belief ever was. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
People ask you for criticism, but they only want praise. Don't refuse to accept criticism, get all the help you can. We learn and grow and are transformed not so much by what we do but why and how we do it.

LESSON OF THE DAY 296

Ayah of the Day:
Like those before you, who were more powerful than you, richer and more populous. They enjoyed their share, and you enjoyed your share, as those before you enjoyed their share. And you enter into vain discussion as those who spoke idly. Their works are futile, in the world and the hereafter; and they are the losers. [9: 69]

Hadith of the Day:
Never does the Son of Adam fill a vessel worse than his stomach. It is enough for the son of Adam to have a few morsels to keep his back straight. But if he must, then let him assign one-third to his food, one-third to his beverage, and one-third to his breath. [Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah]

Wise Quote of the Day:
The one who takes his wealth from unlawful means is deprived in trusting in Allah. [Abdullah ibn Mubarak]

Guidance of the Day:
That people are not angels and that marriage can be very difficult is an acknowledged fact in Islam, and there are therefore instructions for both parties to pre-empt or remedy the main causes of discord.

The importance of safeguarding the marital relationship was very much emphasized by the fact that the Prophet, may God's blessings and peace be upon him, spoke of it on two of the most meaningful occasions, the farewell pilgrimage and on his death bed, when he was expected to mention only matters of the utmost importance.On both occasions he bade men treat their women well and he put the onus of preserving the relationship squarely on their shoulders.

Women are emphatically advised against one of the most common pitfalls, which is to deny their husbands' positive aspects and stress only on their negative ones. They are also told that simply to perform their minimal religious obligations and to obey their husbands (within the limits of the Divine Law) will guarantee them Paradise.

To prevent men from taking these instructions too literally and demanding from their wives total obedience, which is recognized, in fact, to be nearly impossible, the Prophet made it clear that divorce was not to be considered lightly, since it is, 'the permitted thing that is most hateful to God.' It is to be the last resort, after all attempts at reconciliation have failed, including arbitration by the two families' elders. Discretion is strongly enjoined on both spouses for obvious reasons. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
Reflect and you will reach a solution, for only by reflection can subtle problems be solved. Speech is like an arrow, it is necessary to aim it by way of reflection before uttering anything. Do not neglect the purpose of discourse, it's time, it's quality, it's quantity, and it's place.

LESSON OF THE DAY 295

Ayah of the Day:
God has promised hypocritical men and hypocritical women and atheists the fire of hell, wherein they will abide. That is enough for them. And God has cursed them; and there is lasting torment for them. [9: 68]

Hadith of the Day:
Your greatest enemy is your ego, that which is between your two flanks. [Bayhaqi]

Wise Quote of the Day:
The one who always leaves his sunnas will eventually be deprived of his fardh, such a person can never taste of the Divine beauty. [ Abdullah ibn Mubarak]

Guidance of the Day:
Having discussed the Islamic conception of men's nature and roles let us now see what it has to say about women. The hadith says, 'I bid you treat your women well, for women were created from a rib, the part of it that is most bent is its head, should you attempt to straighten it you will break it, and if you leave it be, it will remain bent.' The hadith obviously refers to the symbolism of the story of Eve's creation from Adam's rib. That she was created from him indicates that their natures are similar in many respects and that where they differ they are not in opposition but compliment each other.

The emotional charge required by women to function in the role of mother necessarily influences their ability to think detachedly and objectively, especially when their interests or those of their children are at stake. This is why the upper end of the rib is said to be the part that suffers the most bending, that is, the part that is most subject to the sway of emotions. To attempt to straighten it is to attempt to force women to act like men, which, if at all possible, would forthwith deprive them of their ability to care for their children adequately. It is, however, plainly impossible, and that is why it was said in the hadith that it would break the rib, that is lead to disruption of the relationship and divorce.

This in no way means that there are no women who think more objectively than most men, nor that there are no men who are more emotional than most women. But it does mean that these differences should be seen in a positive not a negative light, since the fact that each provides the things the other lacks makes for a differentiation of roles within the relationship and thus for stability. Women are required to be reasonably obedient, well groomed, efficient in the management of the household, solicitous for the chlildren's welfare, and loyal, that is,discrete as concerns her husband's affairs and their mutual relationship. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
There is no present like the time. Every second and minute is so valuable that the entire world cannot replace it. One will realize this at the time of death. Value your leisure time before you are occupied, value your life before death. Begin work now.

LESSON OF THE DAY 294

Ayah of the Day:
The hypocrites men and women, are of each other; they enjoin abomination and forbid the beneficial, and they are stingy. They have forgotten God, so God has forgotten them. The hypocrites are the ones who are the deviants. [9: 67]

Hadith of the Day:
The marriage which is most blessed is the one which is lightest in burden and expense. [Bayhaqi]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Seek out the company of those who would visit you when you are sick, who would forgive you if you would wrong them, and who would never seek to hide the truth from you. [Bayazeed Bustami]

Guidance of the Day:
The husband should also provide emotional security and support by being a source of warmth and affection, by showing his appreciation for the effort expended within the household. These are his worldly duties.

His religious duties are to teach his family the basics of their faith and the way to perform their acts of worship correctly, and then to supervise their implementation. He is expected to be fairly intransigent as concerns the rights of God on his family and extremely lenient as concerns his own personal rights, and never the reverse. Men should know that they will be asked to account for the way they fulfilled their duties, for the Prophet, may blessings and peace be upon him, has said, 'You are all guardians, and each of you shall be asked to account for his subjects.' [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
Here are a few ways to celebrate joy: complete what you start, enlarge your interests, express gratitude to a friend.

LESSON OF THE DAY 293

Ayahs of the Day:
Do they not know that for whoever opposes God and the messenger of God there is Hell Fire, wherein they will abide? That is the greatest disgrace. [9: 63]

Hadith of the Day:
A truthful and trustworthy merchant is associated with the prophets, the upright and the martyrs. [Tirmidhi]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Seek out a companion to help you in your affairs, and take his counsel concerning matters that occur from both inward states and outward affairs. [Ahmad al Zarruq]

Guidance of the Day:
The basis of the marital relationship in Islam is never passion or infatuation nor mere sexual attraction, but the kind of stable affection that makes for emotional security and thus peace and durability. To achieve this, rules were prescribed in Sharia based upon the very nature of men and women and designed to make the relationship as satisfactory and stable as possible.

That which men were favored with is what allows them to carry out their functions and fulfill their responsibilities, namely an intelligence which is more objective and less subject to emotional influences, the physical strength to work outdoors, the earning power that goes with these two attributes, the responsibility to give the children their name and the consequent hereditary rights.

This makes the man the main factor of stability in the household, the pivot around which all else revolves. He is therefore expected to provide material security to the best of his ability, which includes providing the household with all the necessities of life, protecting its members against external aggression, and acting as arbiter in the event of internal discord. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
To make your dream come true you have to stay awake. If you always live with those who are lame, you will learn to limb.

LESSON OF THE DAY 292

Ayah of the Day:
Charities (Zakah) are only for the poor and needy, and the workers who administer them, and those whose hearts have been reconciled, and those in bondage, and those in debt, and on the cause of God; and for the wayfarer, as an ordinance of God. And God is Omniscient, Most Wise. [9: 60]

Hadith of the Day:
Worshipping at times of tribulation and confusion is like migrating to join me. [Muslim]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Only he is a mutawakkil (one who trusts in the Divine) who fears none but Allah and depends on none but Allah. [Fudhail ibn Iyaadh]

Guidance of the Day:
Marriage is one of the pivotal institutions in Islam and therefore one of the most explicitly regulated. Young men are strongly enjoined to marry as early as possible, as a safe guard against irregular and therefore socially disruptive relationships, and also to enable themselves to reach maturity and stability early in their lives.

It is stated in hadith that, 'When the servant marries he completes half of his religion, let him thereafter fear God in the remaining half.' Another well-known hadith explains how one should choose his spouse-to-be by stating that there are four reasons why a woman is desired for marriage: wealth, social status, beauty and piety. The hadith then goes on to exhort men to give piety priority over all other reasons, since a pious wife is an effective helper on the road to the Hereafter, whereas a worldly one is at best a distraction and at worst an actively nefarious influence. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
A turning wheel doesn't get rusty. Change is not made without inconvenience, even from worse to better. Many people are not failures, they just started at the bottom and like it there.

LESSON OF THE DAY 291

Ayahs of the Day:
They swear by God they are of your number, but they are not; they are, however, people in fear. If they could find a refuge, or a cave, or a retreat, they would resort to it, capricious as they are. [9: 56, 57]

Hadith of the Day:
The grave is either a meadow of the meadows of the Garden, or a pit of the pits of the Fire. [Tirmidhi]

Wise Quote of the Day:
When death comes it does not return empty handed, so occupy every moment in preparedness of it. [Shaqeeq al Balkhi]

Guidance of the Day:
To the disbeliever, self esteem is based on his opinion of himself and what he perceives as others' opinion of him. The believer, on the other hand, bases his self esteem on the human race's ultimate equality in their utter dependence on Divine power to sustain their very existence. For were this sustaining power, to be withdrawn, all would vanish into immediate nothingness.

Self confidence, if based on personal achievement, is nothing but an illusion that can easily be shattered, since achievement is but a free gift, a Divine grace, and, when misused, liable to be withdrawn. Confidence in God, on the other hand, is the calm certainty that as He has given before, He will give again, and as He has protected before, He will protect again, and as He has responded before, He will respond again.

Just as worldly self-confidence increases with the repeated experience of success, confidence in God increases with the repeated experience of Divine responsiveness and solicitude. It ultimately leads to reliance on God in preference to created beings and one's own abilities, and to the piercing of the veil of material causes and effects. Imperturbability is the characteristic of those who achieve this condition, whereas anxiety and futile agitation remain that of those who do not. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
Decieve someone today and you will regret it tomorrow. One who plants thorns must never expect to grow roses.

LESSON OF THE DAY 290

Ayah of the Day:
So do not marvel at their wealth or their children, for God only wants to torment them thereby in the life of the world, and that their souls perish while they are athiests. [9: 55]

Hadith of the Day:
The world is the believer's prison and the disbeliever's paradise. [Muslim]

Wise Quote of the Day:
The one who really knows Allah fills all his moments with seeking meaning from everything through reflection and contemplation, while occupying himself in praise and glorification and perpetually increasing in obedience. [Ibrahim ibn Adham]

Guidance of the Day:
We are enjoined to defend ourselves as best as we can against those who wish us harm, yet one must never lose sight of the reality of things, which is that no harm may reach anyone save with Divine permission. One must always rely upon the Divine wisdom which underlies the secret of destiny and which is the Divine ability to put everything in the most suitable place, at the most suitable time and in the most suitable manner.

For a believer adversity induces emotions different from the usual resentment or mindless rage of man against his destiny. Adversity is seen as a purification from egocentric and individualistic tendencies, then as a necessary preparation for higher spiritual gains. Knowledge of Divine rigor induces in the heart the fear of God and stimulates one's vigilance, with the realization that He knows every thought, word, and act, and that there shall be a reaction in kind to each. At a higher level than fear of retaliation or chastisement is awe before the immensity of the Divine Might. [Man & The Universe]

Du'a of the Week:
Allahummar hamni bi tarkil ma'asi abadamma abqaitani. (O Allah! have mercy on me by helping me abandon disobedience as long as You keep me alive.

Food for Thought:
The one who remembers death frequently will benefit in three ways: he will hasten to repent; he will be content; and he will be active in worship. The one who forgets death will be punished in three ways: he will delay repentance; he will no longer be content; and he will be lazy in worship.

LESSON OF THE DAY 289

Ayahs of the Day:
Say, "Nothing will happen to us but what God has ordained for us; God is our protector." And let the believers put their trust in God. Say, "Are you expecting anything for us but one of two goods? As for us, we are expecting that God will strike you with divine punishment, or by our hands, so wait, for we are waiting with you. [9: 51,52]

Hadith of the Day:
The Hour will not arrive until time contracts, so that a year becomes as a month, a month as a week, a week as a day, a day as an hour, and an hour as a fiery flare. [Tirmidhi]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Let your main concern be to remove from your outerstate anything that is displeasing, then maintain this state through continual counsel. At this point, it is time to turn inward toward your heart's presence and to it's reality, by way of reflection and remembrance. [Ahmad al Zarruq]

Guidance of the Day:
Another related spiritual gain is contentment (rida), which is the state of maintaining one's joyful serenity in the face of adversity in the knowledge that only God is capable of giving and withholding. He is the only power in the universe, and He is the All-Merciful.

The consequence of this understanding is that one neither pleases anyone at the cost of God's displeasure, nor praises anyone to obtain what are actually God's favors nor blames anyone for what God has chosen to withheld. When you perceive the Divine ability as the power that exists, you neither fear any man enough to try to please him at the cost of committing a sin, nor attribute whatever good comes to you through the created beings by whose mediation it was sent, nor credit created beings with the power to withhold that which is yours by Divine decree.

But it must be understood that this state by no means prompts one to act with ingratitude towards one's benefactors, quite to the contrary, for 'He has not thanked God who does not thank men.' And it must be remembered that these are not mere mental constructs we are discussing, but profound states of being reflected in action. [Man & The Universe, by Mostafa al Badawi]

Food for Thought:
There is no free tuition in the field of experience. Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment.

LESSON OF THE DAY 288

Ayah of the Day:
Had they meant to go forth, they would have made some preparation for it; but God was averse to their being sent, and made them lag behind; and they were told to remain with the inactive. [9: 46]

Hadith of the Day:
One who points out something good will have the same reward as the one who actually does it. [Bukhari & Muslim]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Avoid all forms of vain and foul speech to your absolute utmost. Put aside anything that you cannot discern it's benefit immediately. [Ahmad al Zarruq]

Guidance of the Day:
The love of God is a driving force that generates such spiritual gains as total reliance on Him (tawakkul), which is to commit oneself unconditionally to Him and to abandon hope in created beings. It is to perform one's duties to perfection while expecting neither reward nor appreciation from ephemeral beings. It is also to separate the act from its result since the act is from the creature but the result from God, which means that the same act may bring different results if God so wills.

The habitual manner of perceiving cause and effect relationships in this world induces many people to depend on them. Then they forget the unforeseen factors may enter into any such sequence and produce an altogether different result, or that the physical laws of casualty may be superseded by those from higher world or suspended by their Maker. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
The difference between impossible and possible lies in a person's determination. Being ignorant is not so much as a shame, as being unwilling to learn.

LESSON OF THE DAY 287

Ayahs of the Day:
The only ones who ask you for exemption are those who do not believe in God and the last day and whose hearts waver, so they vacillate in their doubt. [9: 45]

Hadith of the Day:
You will not believe as long as you do not love one another. [Muslim]WISE

Quote of the Day:
Quran is-aboveall-a book of guidance. There can be little blessing for those who have insufficient respect and veneration for the Quran to follow its guidance and command. [Shaykh Faraz Rabbani]

Guidance of the Day:
As for woman, Islam allows them to work in case of necessity; in other words, there has to be a justification valid enough for a woman to leave her territory, which is the home, and venture out in the jungle.

Previously a woman's education consisted in the knowledge and discipline necessary for her specific functions and for her life-to-come. The latter gave her far sightedness. In today's urban communities most women receive technical education that raises their expectations and allows them no peace of mind if they stay home.

At the same time, religious education is totally neglected even in "cultured" individuals. Islam always stresses the importance of practical solutions and to claim, as only fanatics do, that this denies women the right to work, leaving them chronically dissatisfied, is nonsensical. [Man and the Universe]

Food for Thought:
Material things bring convenience, comfort, and pleasure, they don't compare to the peace which comes from living within your income. Many small luxuries too increase expense. A new car isn't a sign of how much money a person has, but it's a pretty good indication of how much a person owes.

LESSON OF THE DAY 286

Ayah of the Day:
Those who believe in God and the last day do not ask you for exemption from struggling by means of their possessions and their persons; and God knows who are the conscientious. [9:44]

Hadith of the Day:
The best jihad is to speak a word of justice to an oppressive ruler. [Abu Dawood]

Wise Quote of the Day:
One's worldly abstinence is commensurate with one's longing for the world to come. The abstinent and contented one is only he who is contented and thankful with the divine decree. [Fudhail ibn Iyaadh]

Guidance of the Day:
One of the greatest and most irremediable disasters of modern society is the destruction of the normal role of woman as mothers and wives and its replacement with an ill-defined, ill-assimilated equality with men that has barred the distinctions between the two sexes and relieved each other of their specific responsibilities without offering a valuable alternative.

Mothering is devalued in favor of career achievement and pleasure seeking. By contrast women never felt oppressed in Muslim societies until early in this century when, under the influence of western education the more affluent strata of society began to lead a dual life: a liberated one in Europe, and a more conventional one at home. [Man & The Universe]

Food for Thought:
One should know that commanding the good and forbidding the wrong is the most important fundamental of the religion, and is the mission that Allah sent the Prophets to fulfill. If it were folded up and put away, religion itself would vanish, dissolution appear, while lands come to ruin.

Renunciation (zuhd) of the world does not constitute wearing course clothes and eating stale bread. Real renunciation lies in curbing desires. (Sufyan al Thawri)

LESSON OF THE DAY 285

Ayah of the Day:
Were there immediate advantages and a convenient trip, they would have followed you, but the destination was too far for them. Yet they will swear by God, "We would have gone out with you if we could." They destroy their own souls; and God knows they are liars. [9: 42]

Hadith of the Day:
The one who holds on to my sunna when corruption spreads in my community shall have the reward of a martyr. [Tabrani]

Wise Quote of the Day:
The one who remains fearful of Allah is never touched by the worries of the world. [Sufyan al Thawri]

Guidance of the Day:
Sabr: Sabr is often translated as patience, but it is not just that. It includes self control, perseverance, endurance and a focussed struggle to achieve one's goal. Unlike patience which implies resignation, the concept of sabr includes a duty to remain steadfast to achieve your goals despite all odds. Being patient gives us control in situations where we feel we have little or no control.

Patience helps us keep our mind and attitude towards our difficulties in check. It is easy to get caught up in our own stress and anxiety. However, if we remember that our life is short and temporary, and that the everlasting life is in the Hereafter, this will put our worries in perspective.

Food for Thought:
Efforts, not results, count in the eyes of Allah. It is the mercy of Allah that He does not demand results. He is happy if He finds us making our best efforts.

LESSON OF THE DAY 284

Ayah of the Day:
Go forth, lightly or heavily armed, and strive for the sake of God with your possessions and your persons. That is best for you if you knew. [9: 41]

Hadith of the Day:
Beware of wrong doing, for wrongdoing becomes manifold darkness on the Day of Judgment. [Muslim & Ahmad]

Wise Quote of the Day:
He who truly fears his Lord has freed his tongue from vain talk. He whose heart is in the awe of his Lord, everything in the creation is in awe of him. [Fudhail ibn Iyaadh]

Guidance of the Day:
Knowledge is a means among means. It is not sought in itself in the eyes of the shariah, rather it is a means to actions. Everything that has been related about the virtues of sacred knowledge is only established in terms of that which one has made morally responsible to act upon.

The knowledge that counts according to shariah, is the knowledge that leads to action, which does not leave it's possessor according to what it entails and carries them according to its rulings willingly or otherwise. One should always keep in mind that certain rulings may definitely be difficult to practice upon, but the rewards of Allah in the Hereafter are immense.

Food for Thought:
Fiqh is to know oneself, what is for and against it. The strength of a believer is one's determination and ability of the next life.

LESSON OF THE DAY 283

Ayah of the Day:
If you do not help him, yet God helped him when those who scoffed ejected him, second of two when they were in the cavern: he said to his companion, "Do not fear, for God is with us," and God sent divine peace upon him, and strengthened him with troops you did not see, and made the word of scoffers lowest while the word of God is highest. For God is almighty, most wise. [9: 40]

Hadith of the Day:
Let your tongue never cease to be moist with the remembrance of God. [Tirmidhi]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Those whom Allah loves are granted three things: the overflowing generosity of the river, the illumination of the sun, and the humbleness of the earth. [Bayazeed al Bustami]

Guidance of the Day:
The way of having presence of heart in prayer is to realize that presence of heart is something sought every moment of one's life, and that the means to it is doing dhikr as much as one possibly can, not to churn up the reward alone, but in order to be thankful of Allah, in order to express one's love of Allah, in order to attain unto closeness with Allah, and in order to strive to fulfill the duties of slavehood to Allah Most High.

Avoiding the harm outwardly and inwardly are keys to presence of heart with Allah. Also don't just jump into prayer, focus your heart before for a moment, and then start. Before starting make a quick heartfelt dua that Allah grant you love, thankfulness and sincerity.

The Sunnah prayers after the obligatory prayers were legislated to make up for the deficiency in the obligatory prayer, and the sunnah prayers before the obligatory prayers are to cut the devil from his greed, as if saying: he did not leave out what is not obligatory on him, so how can he leave what is obligatory.

Food for Thought:
Sleeping on one's back is the sleep of the Prophets, who contemplate over the creation of heavens and earth; sleeping on the right side is the sleep of the scholars and worshippers; sleeping on the left is the sleep of the kings to digest food; and sleeping on one's face is the sleep of devils and unbelievers.

LESSON OF THE DAY 282

Ayahs of the Day:
(Believers), unless you go forth, God will punish you with a painful torment, and replace you with another people, while you will not harm God at all. For God is capable of all things. [9: 39]

Hadith of the Day:
A Muslim who stands before another Muslim in hypocrisy and deceit will be stood by Allah on the Day of Judgment in a place of hypocrisy and deceit. [Bukhari]

Wise Quote of the Day:
There are four signs of a diseased heart:
1. To feel no enjoyment in worship.
2. To be in a state without fearing God.
3. To take no lessons from worldly events.
4. To learn something and not to put into practice [Dhunnoon al Misri]

Guidance of the Day:
Understanding one another's emotional command systems makes the formation of healthy, strong relationships even easier. Such understanding can help you feel the way you do and why others may feel differently. Suddenly, conflicts don't seem so confounding or overwhelming. You've got a framework to help you manage your conflicts and achieve more harmonious relationships.

Stay observant, patient, and optimistic. If you take every opportunity you can to turn toward the bids of the people in your life, the rewards of this process will become increasingly more evident, and increasingly easy to achieve. It's like learning to drive a car. At first it seems like you have to pay attention to an impossible number of details--the speed limit, the center line, the rearview mirror, and so on. But with time, driving well becomes automatic and you can travel safely and efficiently with very little conscious thought.

Practice these principles of bidding and responding and, in time, binding will become second nature. You'll feel more deeply connected to those who matter most. [The Relationship Cure]

Food for Thought:
Conditions of repentance are five:
1. Leaving the sin.
2. Remorse over having committed the sin.
3. Resolve never to return to the sin.
4. Return the rights or property one wrongly took.
5. It is recommended to seek forgiveness a lot, and to repent everytime the sin comes to one's mind.

LESSON OF THE DAY 281

Ayah of the Day:
Believers, what is the matter with you that you sink to the ground when you are told to go forth in the cause of God? Do you prefer the life of the world to the hereafter? The enjoyment of the world is but little compared to the hereafter. [9: 38]

Hadith of the Day:
A believer who eats at the expense of another believer will be fed from the fires of Hell; a believer who dresses at the expense of another believer will be clothed from the Fires of Hell. [Bukhari]

Wise Quote of the Day:
The wealthiest person is the one who has abundance of taqwa. [Dhunnoon al Misri]

Guidance of the Day:
You don't have to wait for an earthquake--or a car accident, a heart attack, or any other near disaster--to start appreciating and improving your relationships. You can begin today in the smallest of ways by extending simple, positive bids for connection and turning towards others' bids in a positive way. If you start to look around, you will begin to see new and surprising opportunities for emotional connection all around you, and your life will start to change in positive ways.

One of the best things about turning toward others' bids for connection is the way that positive responses typically lead to more bidding, more turning toward. Any small, positive effort can get the ball rolling in the right direction. This means you can start anytime, anywhere to improve your relationships and your life. It's simply a matter of becoming a "collector of emotional moments," of recognizing all the potential for connection in small, seemingly insignificant interactions--a shy smile, a weak hello, an invitation to the grocery store. [The Relationship Cure]

Food for Thought:
Knowledge calls for practice, if practice follows, knowledge increases. If practice does not follow, knowledge goes away or becomes a burden. Real knowledge must bear fruit, otherwise it is useless, harmful knowledge.

LESSON OF THE DAY 280

Ayahs of the Day:
They wish to extinguish the light of God with their words, but God insists on fulfilling the divine light, even if scoffers are averse. God is the one who sent the messenger with guidance and the religion of truth, to distinguish it over all religion, even if polytheists object. (9: 32,33]

Hadith of the Day:
A believer is his brother's mirror. A believer is a brother to a believer, for he looks after his affairs and protects him from behind. [Bukhari]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Three things are extremely difficult: being generous when one is poor, being truthful when one is fearful, and being pious when one is alone. [Bishr Hafi]

Guidance of the Day:
When there's a crisis and there's no time to think--only to react--we automatically turn toward one another in the kindest way and hang on to one another for support. That's the way it can be in solid relationships with your spouse, your children, your relatives, and your coworkers. Strong bonds are not necessarily forged out of earth-shattering events like job loss, irreconcilable conflict, or horrid disaster. Trust doesn't require gut-wrenching conversations that plumb the depths of our souls. Rather, good relationships usually develop slowly over time, growing out of the thousands of mundane interactions we share each day.

But when a crisis comes, all that thoughtfulness pays off richly. If you make a habit of turning toward one another's bids for connection, you'll have better access to the healing power of humor, affection, and compassion during times of conflict or catastrophe. By practicing the kind of mindful listening that allows you to understand each other's experiences, you become more sensitive to each other's needs. [The Relationship Cure]

Food for Thought:
Happiness walks on busy feet. Good ideas need landing gears as well as wings. Whoever's aspiration is high, his rank rises.

LESSON OF THE DAY 279

Ayahs of the Day:
Then God sent down divine peace upon the messenger of God, and on the believers, and sent down forces you did not see, and punished those who scoffed; and that is the reward of the atheists. Then God will turn after that to whomever God wishes to turn; for God is most forgiving, most merciful. [9: 26, 27]

Hadith of the Day:
A believer is his brother's mirror. If he sees something wrong in it, he fixes it. [Bukhari]

Wise Quote of the Day:
To gain even a little certainty is better than that the world contains; for this is an increase which draws one to the eternal abode. [Dhunnun al Misri]

Guidance of the Day:
As people grow up and leave home, sibling relationships take a back-seat to other bonds like marriage, friendship, and parenthood. But as we approach middle age, two things typically happen that bring our siblings back into the forefront of our lives. First, our parents grow old, requiring siblings to come together around such issues as long-term care, their parents' end of life decisions, and healing from the grief of a parent's death.

And, second, we start to think more deeply about the stories of our own lives: how our childhood relationships with parents and brothers and sisters affected us; what the bonds of extended family mean to us today. Our adult relationship with our siblings loom large as we grapple with these issues and questions. We reach a new level of understanding and a much more respectful relationship. It's definitely a work in progress. And keeping the lines of communication open will continue to be important.

We can't accept our differences until we acknowledge what those differences are. Then, if we decide to strengthen our connections despite our differences, we can express that desire to one another, creating a much deeper, more meaningful relationship. [The Relationship Cure]

Food for Thought:
Even when opportunity knocks, a person must get off his seat to open the door. The only big thing achieved in life without effort is failure. All glory comes from daring to begin.

LESSON OF THE DAY 278

Ayah of the Day:
God has certainly helped you on many battlefields, and on the day of Hunain, when your numerical superiority delighted you, but was no benefit to you, and the earth, spacious as it was, narrowed on you, and you turned back in retreat. [9: 25]

Hadith of the Day:
Every religion has a quality that is characteristic of that religion, and the characteristic of my religion is modesty. [Ibn Majah]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Even if contentment were to bring honor only in this world it would still be the best thing. [Bishr Hafi]

Guidance of the Day:
You don't choose your brothers and sisters the way you choose your friends. Unlike friends, your relationship is not centered on living in the same neighborhood, belonging to the same social circle, or working at the same types of jobs. So chances are greater that you will be on uneven ground, with one of you having more wealth, more accomplishments, or better luck than the other.

Comparison and competition also stems from natural curiosity about the road taken. Although such comparisons are normal and may give you some insights into your own life, they're usually not very helpful for developing better feelings toward your siblings. People are advised to accept their differences and to acknowledge any feelings that may result---feelings like jealousy, envy, pride, sorrow, or resentment. But try not to dwell on the inequalities you may perceive. Give your attention instead to the task of trying to understand your sibling and his or her experiences, and you can look forward to a much richer relationship. [The Relationship Cure]

Du'a of the Week:
Allahummar zuqna taa'ataka wa taa'ata rasoolika. (O Allah grant us Your obedience and the obedience of Your messenger, ameen).

Food for Thought:
The trouble with the world is not that people know too little, but they know so many things that aren't so. The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook.

LESSON OF THE DAY 277

Ayah of the Day:
Say, "If your fathers and your sons and your brothers and your wives and your relatives and the goods that you acquire and business for which you fear failure and homes you find agreeable are more dear to you than God and the messenger of God and struggle in the cause of God, then wait until God comes with divine order; for God does not guide the dissolute. [9: 24]

Hadith of the Day:
The best of you are those who, when you look at them you remember Allah. [Tirmidhi]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Satan does not bother to misguide the one who runs after the world, for he is already misguided. [Mohammad Waa'se]

Guidance of the Day:
Ask people about their feelings toward their brothers and sisters, and you rarely get a neutral response. Whether we view our siblings as a source of delight or heartbreak, it is clear that sibling bonds are often the most emotionally charged relationships in our lives. The reason is that people typically spend an enormous amount of time with siblings at a very impressionable age. Consequently, these relationships become interpersonal "learning labs"--a place where children first experiment with behaviors and roles they can use later in life.

Because these patterns of interaction are set at an early age, it's sometimes hard to stay present in your relationships with siblings. In adulthood, you find yourself relating to brothers and sisters as you remember them. If you want to connect emotionally, however, you've to be able to see and understand one another as you are today. This often takes an extra measure of effort, attentiveness, and curiosity---a willingness to ask. Expanding your view of your sibling in this way will provide you with a much broader and deeper terrain upon which to connect.

At the same time, to acknowledge your shared history is also important. It's what makes our relationships with our siblings so unique, and talking about the past is certainly one way to connect emotionally. But if you want your relationships with siblings to grow and evolve, try not to focus exclusively on yesterday's issues. Remember also that people with truly satisfying sibling relationships often treat one another as they would their friends. [The Relationship Cure]

Food for Thought:
The roots of happiness grow deepest in the soil of service. He who forgets the language of gratitude can never be on speaking terms with "happiness."

LESSON OF THE DAY 276

Ayah of the Day:
Believers, do not take your fathers, and your brothers for protectors if they prefer atheism to faith. Those of you who choose them are the ones who are in the wrong. [9: 23]

Hadith of the Day:
Do good and shun evil. Consider what your ears would like to hear said of you by people after you have left their company, and then do that. Consider what your ears would not like to hear said of you by people after you have left their company, and avoid doing that. [Bukhari]

Wise Quote of the Day:
He who desires honor in this world should not make his needs known to anyone in the creation, nor should he seek out faults of anyother. [Bishr Hafi]

Guidance of the Day:
Use your child's expression of feelings as an opportunity for intimacy or teaching. When your child opens to you with expression of fear, sadness, or anger, try to validate those feelings by saying that you understand why he or she might feel this way. Then work with your child to solve the problem that's causing the sadness, anger, or fear.

Understand that emotions can be extremely intense for children. That's because they lack the life experience that teaches, "This too shall pass." They may not understand that the sadness, fear, or anger they are feeling is not going to last for ever. So, when you talk to kids about their feelings, don't underestimate or dismiss the intensity of what they are going through. If you do, you may blow an important opportunity to connect with them.

Notice, validate, and name your child's emotions. Help your child to find words for what he or she is feeling. Then, without dismissing the feelings, offer some guidance on how to cope. Set limits on behavior, all emotions are acceptable, but some behaviors are not. [The Relationship Cure]

Food for Thought:
The test of good manners is to be patient with bad ones. Friends of Allah are those who are generous, they do not hold grudges in their hearts and they have good opinions of the slaves of Allah.